So...That Happened.

[dodger_sister]

Well, I didn’t have to play hostesses to my brother and his family all week…because I ended up in the hospital.

Yeah.

I know I don’t talk about my health a lot on LJ, mostly because LJ is a much needed break from people acting like my health problems are all that make up who I am.

But this is too big not to tell you guys.


I had a seizure this weekend. That has never happened before. I hit my head on the medicine cabinet in the bathroom on Friday. My vision whited out for a few seconds and then I felt nauseous for a few minutes but after that I was fine. Except for the giant lump on my head, that apparently even bled a little.

On Saturday, I entertained the houseguests and watched the ballgame. Then right before bed, I got overcome with exhaustion, ringing in my ears, sweating. I went to the bathroom so I could get ready for bed and I felt like I was about to pass out. I hollered for my sister and she came in. One minute I was talking to her and the next I was having a seizure. I went unconscious after that but when I came to, I was oriented and understood what had happened. The whole thing lasted less than 30 seconds.

The doctor say it wasn’t an actual seizure but instead when I passed out, my heart rate and breathing went so low that I was denied oxygen to my brain and that caused seizure-like symptoms. They admitted me for three days and ran all the tests - heart and brain activity were all good. They can’t tell me what happened. No one seems to think it was a concussion from the head injury though, but I don’t believe them at this point. One doctor said it could have been “the perfect storm” - exhausted, stressed, dehydrated, head injury all working against my body regulating itself when I felt faint, causing the oxygen loss to my brain.

It was scary as fuck. Scarier even for my sister. And the whole time I was in the hospital I just wanted to go home and snuggle with my cat but then I remembered I lost him last weekend. It’s been a bad few weeks. I am home now but still without any definite explanation. I swear, doctor work is just guess work most of the time. I have to wear a heart monitor for three weeks (it itches and I hate it) in case it happens again, they can see what my heart does during it. I am exhausted from the anxiety of it all. The lump on the back of my head still hurts. I missed most of my brother’s visit. My mother is driving me insane. My best cat is gone. I am FML about everything in my life.

In sum: If one more person tells me that I am an inspiration for others, or that God made me special for a reason, or that I need to keep a positive attitude to keep bringing hope to other sick people - I am going to kick someone’s fucking teeth in.

I'm just going to try not to dwell too much on it all and get back to my regularly scheduled program. It's how I deal.

Comments

[vikingprincess]

What a load of suck on top of a major loss. I'm really sorry you had to deal with this and ended up missing so much of the visit. *hugs*

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was a sucky week and only slowly getting better. /hugs back/

[caera1996.livejournal.com]

That sucks. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time right now. But you've got the right attitude...and in Winston Churchill's words: "If you're going through Hell, keep going!"

I'll keep you in my prayers.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

and in Winston Churchill's words: "If you're going through Hell, keep going!"

I like this sentiment!!! I'll keep that in mind. :)

[sarahk-1963.livejournal.com]

*ducks the flying karate kicks*

...if one more person tells me that I am inspiration for others..etc...

Your sooo right, if I had a dollar for everytime I heard something similar, I'd be a godzillionaire (that is so a word!!) Personally, I've found that punching the feck out of my pillow, helps to get rid of the anger and frustration I feel (not all of it) - but some is better than none, and that way you don't bruise your knuckles or hand.

Thanks for keeping me up-to-date. I hope the next week is seizure free.

hugs, sarahk_1963

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Your sooo right, if I had a dollar for everytime I heard something similar, I'd be a godzillionaire (that is so a word!!) Personally, I've found that punching the feck out of my pillow, helps to get rid of the anger and frustration I feel (not all of it) - but some is better than none, and that way you don't bruise your knuckles or hand.

"Godzillionaire" is so a word - I agree!! I wish I had one of those little kid punching bags with the clown on them that rebound every time you punch them. My life was sucking so hard right at that moment and I really didn't need to hear about how "inspiring" I am. That doc would have been appalled if she had known I was thinking about burning the world right at that moment.

/hugs back/ (Hope you are doing well these days too, darling).

[ceitfianna]

*hugs* I'm glad you're okay now.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

/hugs/ Thank you. One day at a time here.

[misslucyjane]

Virtual cookies and many snuggles, dear.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

I like cookies! Thank you, darling. /hugs/

[rhymephile.livejournal.com]

Ugh, what a shitty way to end of the week! You haven't started any new meds lately, have you? My sister-in-law started some meds and had a seizure...the doctors said the meds didn't cause it but there was nothing else to explain it.

I hope it was an anomaly and things get back to normal soon. ♥

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Nope, no new meds. It was the first thing they asked. I had a seizure one other time as a kid and it was from a medication reaction - in fact, no one was in the room with me and I had been having uncontrolled muscle spasms (and my insane mother refused to take me to the ER) and then I blacked out for a second, so we were never sure if it was a seizure or not. But the only new meds I am on now is an over the counter daily allergy pill that I started two whole months ago.

Your sister-in-law may have had an allergy to the meds - my reaction as a kid was not one that was a known reaction, but it was the onlyexplanation and it stopped as soon as the meds did.

Now if I could just stop being so tired all the time. <3

ran off at the fingers, sorry!

[saddle_tramp]

*sends sympathetic vibes your way* I've been almost exactly where you were, but I didn't hit my head. lol I just went in the bathroom one day and somehow ended up sort of unconscious while still sitting upright on the toilet (I know, TMI, sorry!) and talking to my niece. I personally felt like I blacked out completely, but my niece says I kept telling her "I'm fine" even though I sounded like I was drunk.

I got lucky and managed to avoid the hospital, but I was unwillingly chaperoned 24/7 by my niece for a few days before she finally decided to believe me when I said I had just let my sugar level get too low. I don't really think it was sugar related -- we had split a Skor bar not long before it happened -- but she believed me anyway because she said I acted like Shelby did in Steel Magnolias, just without the getting mad. All I know is I was feeling kind of weird when I sat down to use the bathroom, and then next thing I knew the bathroom door was open and my niece was holding a half-empty glass of juice in front of my face and saying "Drink some more, Sarah!" really loud. Evidently, movies are good for something after all. ;-D

Hopefully whatever your problem was, it will be like mine and not turn into a habit! It's been a year and I haven't randomly gone poof again yet. Really, what happened to me that day felt almost identical to what happens when I have a heat stroke, but it wasn't hot that day and I had been drinking water with lemon in it for hours (hence the trip to the bathroom) so I dunno WTF it was. I never remember what I said or did during a heat stroke either, but I've been told I stay surprisingly rational while I chug any water bottle handed to me between pauses to say I'm fine. lol

If one more person tells me that I am an inspiration for others~ (cut for space) ~I am going to kick someone’s fucking teeth in.

SO MUCH WORD. Like, there is not enough WORD in the world to cover the amount of WORD I feel for that statement.

And I don't think I ever commented about losing your beloved kitty, so I need to apologize for that. Very soon I will be in your shoes because my retired service dog, Giz, is seventeen and senile with his health going downhill fast, so your loss hits very close to home for me. Even Murphy, my current service dog, can tell Giz doesn't have much time left. For the last week or two she has been randomly walking over to him and nudging him or licking his face, then waiting for a reaction before she walks away and lets him go back to sleep. It took me days to realize she was checking to see if he's still alive, just like she sees me do every morning when I get up. :-/

Re: ran off at the fingers, sorry!

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you for all the support on the health and the kitty.

I actually have heard of what happened to you on the toilet. It happens to my cousin all the time - she frequently passes out on the toilet (something I only just found out after my seizure). It is called a vasovagal episode and it is the firing of a nerve that causes you to pass out (kind of like what happens when people faint at the sight of blood and such) only it can also be caused by straining while on the toilet or even while peeing. No one knows why.

This is what the doctors kept saying happened to me because no one was listening to the fact that my symptoms started before I got anywhere near a bathroom. I was on the computer and I felt tired, ringing in my ears, sweating - it's why I decided to go to the bathroom and go to bed. I finally got a doctor to listen to the fact that it wasn't from straining on the toilet. Damn doctors, I swear. ;)

And now we have TMIed each other. And I brought you a PSA about passing out on the toilet. Huh. Okay then. ;)

I am so sorry to hear about Giz. It is never easy watching them grow old like that. Before we lost Papa Bear, the other cats did not want to get to close but they would smell him and then go lay a little ways away - like they wanted to be near him but not bother him too much.

My thoughts are with you and your family and your pets, darling.

[jojothecr.livejournal.com]

Oh gosh, that sounds scary. I'm so sorry, for all that and for not having your cat around anymore, it sucks so much.
I hope you'll feel only better from now on.
*hugs*

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was terribly scary, especially for my sister who thought I was dying. I am slowly feeling better. My cat was always so good at caring for me when I was sick, so it is hard with him gone.

/hugs/

[ranua.livejournal.com]

Ah dear, that really sucks. When it rains it pours I suppose. (randomly, do you know why that phrase is on the Morton salt containers? It's because it was the only salt, at the time, treated to not clump in humid conditions/rain. *in stewardess voice* Please enjoy your useless trivia)

As a hypoglycemic I can attest to the fact passing out is scary as fuck. I sincerely hope it was a case of your body being weird like they can be and not a sign of crap to come.

On a totally saccharine, looking to get my teeth kicked in, note, things will get better. But you already know that, just thought you'd like a confirmation. ((hugs))

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

When it rains it pours I suppose. (randomly, do you know why that phrase is on the Morton salt containers? It's because it was the only salt, at the time, treated to not clump in humid conditions/rain. *in stewardess voice* Please enjoy your useless trivia)

You are such a nerd. <3

They have me testing my blood sugar all week this week, to see if it a blood sugar problem. Could be a precursor to diabetes but if so, it is a very early early sign of it, as my glucose is still fine.

I hope things will get better, but I have a problem with patience. Saying things will get better is nice - telling me I am enduring this horrible illness for other people's "inspiration" will get your teeth kicked in.

/hugs back/

[ranua.livejournal.com]

telling me I am enduring this horrible illness for other people's "inspiration" will get your teeth kicked in. I always wonder how pathetic these 'other' people are if I'm an inspiration to them.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Word.

[fragrantwoods.livejournal.com]

Damn. I want all the fucksuckiness to stop for you asap. And I admire your restraint in settling for kicking obnoxious folks' teeth in. Al Swearengen says you have his permission to use his line on the inspiration-telling folks, etc.:

"Why the fuck are you saying this to me?"

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

And I admire your restraint in settling for kicking obnoxious folks' teeth in. Al Swearengen says you have his permission to use his line on the inspiration-telling folks, etc.:

"Why the fuck are you saying this to me?"

You are saying I should have fed them to the pigs? lol I was grateful that I had a different doctor the next day - if that lady had walked back in my room again, I was going to whip out my best Al-impersonation until she fled my presence.

For some reason, your words of hope and cursing made me feel better. ;)

[princesslanie.livejournal.com]

hugs & cupcakes :)

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you, darling. May I have the cookie in your icon - it looks delicious. ;) /hugs/

[blue-fjords.livejournal.com]

Ay dios mio! Awww, I'm so sorry Papa Bear wasn't there for huggles. I send you huggles now, sweetheart.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Papa Bear was just so good at taking care of me when I was sick - it has been hard going through all this without him. /huggles back/

Your icon FTW. (Bobby FTW as well - but you know I feel that way).

[matchboximpala.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry and I want to give you a giant hug.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I will take giant hugs. :)

[wolfrider89.livejournal.com]

Oh baby, that sounds scary as hell! I'm so sorry the weeks just keep on sucking. I swear I will have a stern talk with them asap!

I hope your head stops hurting soon, and that the heart monitor doesn't drive you crazy with the itching. I'll be thinking of you! *hugs*

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

It was scary - especially afterwards, the fear thinking all the time that it will happen again. It is exhausting being so stressed. I wish the planets and moon and whatever the crap would align to give me some good luck!

The heart monitor is leaving welts on my skin. Ugh. I feel so whiny about it all, but it sucks.

But the other night I dreamed that you and Brie were coming to visit me and I woke up smiling. That was nice. :)

/hugs/

[wolfrider89.livejournal.com]

That's gotta be stressfull as hell, to be wondering if something is gonna happen any minute now.

Welts? Ouch. That's sucky as hell.

Aw, that sounds awesome! :D I got to dream visit you? I like! *hugs*

(appropriate icon, there. :))