Pig In A Post Day!
Jan. 6th, 2015 08:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Today is Tuesday, so I’m making a post. I’m going to try to keep up this ‘Pig In A Post’ thing, where I make a post every Tuesday, as it helps me keep on my journaling. And also it is a clever name, shut up!
So, today at my counseling session this conversation occurred…
Therapist: You need a passage to recite during an anxiety spike, something you can focus on repeating and distract yourself. It can be anything, even a passage from your favorite fic.
Me: Oh. There is a passage in Asunder that I’ve read like 100 times. I should pull that up.
Th: Which fic is this?
Me: Asunder by rageprufrock? It’s my favorite fic ever. Have you read this one?
Th: Oh. My. God. I love Asunder. I will read anything by Pru. Even fandoms I’m not in. If she wrote it, I’ll read it. ... ... But I can’t even focus on Dean/Cas right now because the latest Hobbit movie came out and I am overcome with Bagginshield feelings. I need all the Bagginshield fic!
So when I told my sister all of this, she said…“Okay, that’s it. You need to find someone new to talk about your anxiety with. You find someone else to talk about your feelings with, so she can come over to our house and let me scream about my feelings. I have a lot of feelings!”
Like the last 15 minutes of my session was spent talking about fandom stuff, completely unrelated to my anxiety. When my sister came in the room to get me, I was in the middle of telling my therapist all about The Flash, in comparison to Arrow, which she watches. And my sister is now convinced that I don’t actually do anything in my sessions but talk about fannish stuff. Oh man, I wish! I swear, we spent a long time talking about my parents first and she gave me homework and stuff. I swear!
So, today at my counseling session this conversation occurred…
Therapist: You need a passage to recite during an anxiety spike, something you can focus on repeating and distract yourself. It can be anything, even a passage from your favorite fic.
Me: Oh. There is a passage in Asunder that I’ve read like 100 times. I should pull that up.
Th: Which fic is this?
Me: Asunder by rageprufrock? It’s my favorite fic ever. Have you read this one?
Th: Oh. My. God. I love Asunder. I will read anything by Pru. Even fandoms I’m not in. If she wrote it, I’ll read it. ... ... But I can’t even focus on Dean/Cas right now because the latest Hobbit movie came out and I am overcome with Bagginshield feelings. I need all the Bagginshield fic!
So when I told my sister all of this, she said…“Okay, that’s it. You need to find someone new to talk about your anxiety with. You find someone else to talk about your feelings with, so she can come over to our house and let me scream about my feelings. I have a lot of feelings!”
Like the last 15 minutes of my session was spent talking about fandom stuff, completely unrelated to my anxiety. When my sister came in the room to get me, I was in the middle of telling my therapist all about The Flash, in comparison to Arrow, which she watches. And my sister is now convinced that I don’t actually do anything in my sessions but talk about fannish stuff. Oh man, I wish! I swear, we spent a long time talking about my parents first and she gave me homework and stuff. I swear!
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Date: 2015-01-07 04:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-01-08 08:47 pm (UTC)It certainly makes explaining my social life easy! I can't believe she is into Bagginshield! lol I had to restrain from reccing her my own story!
and The Flash is so good. I like Arrow but Flash hits my superhero likes.
They are so very different. It's like Batman vs Spiderman - you get way different things from them both...Apples and oranges, both fruit but not remotely the same, except they both grow on trees. Arrow is a heavy burden kind of superhero, and I enjoy that hardcore, dark aspect of that world, but The Flash is a more shiny, optimistic, nerdy kind of superhero and that show has more smiles to it. I like them both, and probably like Arrow more, but it does not surprise me that you like Flash the best. I am so attached to every character on Arrow - they are my boos. I hope to get that attached to people on Flash too!
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Date: 2015-01-08 09:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-01-08 02:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-01-08 08:50 pm (UTC)LOL That would be an expensive fangirl session! We try to save the fangirling for the end of the session. ;) It is always weird though, to casually mention like, "Just tinkering on a story about The Avengers," and have the other person go, "What? You write fanfic?!" Which is what happened with my counselor. I can't believe her OTP is my OTP and that she is a Hobbit girl too. At least when she says, "How did you distress from that situation?" and I answer, "Writing porn," she doesn't even blink. 8)
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Date: 2015-01-09 10:17 pm (UTC)I hope you had a good new years!! I posted a great Hobbit cartoon on tumblr recently that made me think of you. I also got a lord of the rings hoody, it's all the fellowship as cats, it is awesome.
Anyway, I hope you are well
*hugs*
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Date: 2015-01-11 10:54 pm (UTC)I didn't plan on it! I figured if she asked about hobbies I would just say what I normally say when I don't want to bother to explain it and that is 'Oh, I write short stories. I'm in a writing forum online where we all share our work. It's cool because writing is my hobby and now I have a way to make it a social thing too!" This gets social workers off my back about needing a hobby and needing a social life, since I am mostly homebound and such. But I was complaining about never knowing what to say at family parties when people ask what I've been up to and I said, "Oh, like what, do they want to hear about the story I am writing about The Avengers, I don't think so!" and then I moved on, but I noticed she made a face and I thought, 'Oh no, she thought that was a weird thing for me to be doing.' But like five minutes later she went, "So when you mentioned the Avengers story, I thought, wait, she writes fanfic!" And my counselor called it fanfic so I knew she was one of us. It was just a quick little thing I said but she totally picked up on it and now we can spend the last 15 minutes of my sessions geeking out. We are in so many of the same fandoms too, it's awesome! But it was never my plan to tell her at all!
I also got a lord of the rings hoody, it's all the fellowship as cats, it is awesome.
AWESOME! I also keep meaning to reply to your email with the HP dress, because holy shit! It's like a wizarding newspaper turned into a dress and it is so cool looking and I even love the shape and form of it!
I did have a very good New Years, thank you! You? I also had houseguests this weekend, so between the two things I have been super busy it seems like - haven't even written yet this year, boo.
I hope you are feeling better than the last time we talked, babe!
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Date: 2015-01-14 01:16 am (UTC)Everyone knows about my original stuff now, everyone who matters. My mum's an old school Catholic lady, but she brags about it, she was at the hairdressers today and she told all the old ladies. I mean my family used to wonder what I did all night, now they know I'm often writing, they'll wish me luck, ask what I'm working on, it's great.
I'm glad you can be comfortable with your therapist, that must make it easier to talk with her, be honest with her. side note, I'm no therapist, but if you have anything you just need to talk out, or vent about, you have my email, use it any time.
I thought you'd like the dress, I had to show you. It's so geeky, but in the best way. I've found a marvel dress and an alice in wonderland dress in the same style, I might get those for my birthday.
The new year was good, thanks hun. I'm hoping the book news I told you about is a good omen for the year.
Boo to not writing, but houseguests are fun, if tiring, hopefully it was guests you really liked, I hope you guys had fun and you didn't push yourself too much, I know how that goes.
Like I said on my post, sick again, but oh well, could be worse, we both know that, right?
Sorry for the late reply, I've not been on my laptop in days. But it's time to get to work!
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Date: 2015-01-18 07:48 pm (UTC)OMG, that's so awesome!! Same thing happened with me and my sister. I discovered fanfic and was telling her all about it - 'oh people write stories about hobbits!' and going on and on explaining it to her and then a few months later she gave me a fic she wrote and when I was like, "Omg, this is so good," she took me to the computer and showed me...she had a website! She'd been in fandom for years, starting with The X-Files. By this time she had begun to write and was into hobbits and I had actually read one of her fics already and it was like one of my fav fics and I was like, "Wait, you're Baylor?! I love you!" For real.
Everyone knows about my original stuff now, everyone who matters. My mum's an old school Catholic lady, but she brags about it, she was at the hairdressers today and she told all the old ladies. I mean my family used to wonder what I did all night, now they know I'm often writing, they'll wish me luck, ask what I'm working on, it's great.
Dude, that's amazing! So many people would turn their nose up at what you do or try to talk you into writing 'real' books and that your family are not ANY of those people, that they are so supportive, is stellar! It makes me all happy inside to know there are such supportive, open-minded people like that out there, to back our writing, you know.
side note, I'm no therapist, but if you have anything you just need to talk out, or vent about, you have my email, use it any time.
I appreciate it! You should follow my disability Tumblr - Disableism (http://disableism.tumblr.com/) and submit things for Complaint Of The Day and give me good stuff to reblog on EDS. Most of the stuff I talk about with my anxiety counselor is like, "Okay, I had a weird pain in my side the other day and my brain suddenly thought, 'Oh, this is a sign you are going to get really sick and end up in the hospital' and before I could tell my brain to shut up, it was off and running with all of the things that could go wrong in my body. How do I deal with that?" So, health anxiety issues and coping techniques.
hopefully it was guests you really liked, I hope you guys had fun and you didn't push yourself too much, I know how that goes.
It was one of my oldest fangirl friends and her son, so yes, def people I was happy to have!!!! And I was very good about not pushing myself. I went to bed one night while everyone was all still up doing stuff together and I was pissy in my room because I could hear they were watching a movie that I love and I was missing out, but I just HAD to get into bed. So I did. Being responsible sucks. 80
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Date: 2015-01-20 01:23 am (UTC)I know some awesome people, who are all proud of me. I love them.
I'm following it, I found it last night when I was catching up on your tumblr. It's a great idea. I will try and find some good posts to add to it, and I will definitely complain. I'll probably have my first compliant tomorrow, I have an MRI apportionment boo.
Anxiety sucks so bad, on so many levels, and when you do have real health issues, like we do, it's easy to think the worst is going to happen when you get a pain or something, it's hard to stop, I do it too.
Awesome, guests like that are always welcome. Sometimes bed is a must. I pretty much collapsed into mine after the concert, stayed up five more hours, the fell into a dead sleep till I got up like six hours latter, which, I never sleep solid for that long.